Johnathan.org

January 2016 Archives

The Pulp Fiction Live Blog

Watch Pulp Fiction, they said. It’ll be riveting, they said.

I was told today that there’s no good reason for not seing Pulp Fiction if I saw Django Unchained or The Hateful Eight. Fine, I said to them. I’ll watch it tonight.

So here it is. I watch Pulp Fiction and write about it as the movie plays out. It’s 2 hours 33 minutes 59 seconds by Netflix’s watch.

Sweet. The classical diner scene. I forgot that guy was in this. What the hell is his name? That accent guy from Star Trek and that show about people’s ticks when they lie. I have no idea what he’s said. I need to turn up the volume.

“Garson, coffee!” heh. “Garson means boy.” heh heh. I think?

Restaurants don’t get robbed because there’s too many witnesses.

Yep. This is a Quentin Tarintino movie.

Let’s play Spot Spot the Director During His Cameo.

I think I remember starting to watch this movie, and gave up right about… here… the title credits.

Le Big Mac. Mayonaise fries. K.

I always enjoy a movie with Samuel L. Jackson. He’s got some greal emotion.

The foot massage logic is sound.

I Also always enjoy a movie with long single takes. This hallway shot is putting this movie on that list.

Staring at the backs of their heads makes me think they’re standing at urinals.

I keep lights in all my briefcases.

“Say what! Say what again!”

Don’t blink, Bruce!

That band-aid. Was he in The Matrix?

Sorry I checked out. Something about Bruce and Mr. Band-Aid and fancy coke. I don’t know.

I’m a half hour into this movie and have no idea what’s going on. Awesome.

So THAT’s where the lost Travolta meme came from. God he’s awkward looking.

Don’t be a rectangle composed of a dashed outline.

Slot cars. I remember those. I enjoyed those when I was a kid.

This is about where I fall asleep.

Yeah, it was that boring. Sometimes, I just can’t get into a movie. I fell asleep at this point and I guess I woke up to turn the TV off. About an hour later, I woke up again, thinking something from the movie snapped me awake but the TV was off. My PS4 running Netflix was still going and the movie was still running.

My Postmates Experience Live Blog

I was feeling a bit lazy tonight but wanted food, so instead of going somewhere, I desired for someone to bring the food to me. Are they up to the challenge of being summoned by Postmates, picking up my Gyro and traversing Silicon Valley, to my driveway, through the first controlled access roadblock, to my building, and through the second controlled access liftway? Let’s find out.

This is my pseudo-live blog on my first Postmates experience.

Stay tuned to the end to see if the food was any good!

7:10pm – I found my tasty greek food just a few miles away, and with a wait time of roughly 40ish minutes. For $24 with all extras and fees, I’m super excited to get my gyro fix, thanks to Athena Grill.

Using Apple Pay made this even simpler. I love paying with my thumb.

7:13pm – Postmates says 51 minutes, and will be picked up by someone we’ll code name Sheepdog, since I didn’t ask them if they were okay with being mentioned. Sweet! More than 40 but less than an hour, so I’m good. I’m not terribly hungry yet, so no need for alarm.

7:17pm – Postmates called. They want to know if I wanted fries with my Gyro… well… I didn’t ask for fries in my order, so no.

7:20pm – Postmates calls again. They confirmed with Athena Grill: no fries. I ask if this is a normal exchange, since this is my first time using the service. The gentleman on the phone says no and that they only asked because fries or a drink typically comes with the gyro.

I can understand the double-check, but the app should have told me this was an option. The menu in Postmates wasn’t very clear on this, in fact I didn’t know fries were a thing with the Gyro. Oh well. I didn’t really want them, anyway, so it’s no a huge deal. Some room for improvement, there.

7:24pm – I’m checking my app, again, curious to see how this exchange affected my delivery time. We’re up to 59 minutes, now. Hmm. Well, I guess I’ll let that go since there was some confusion on the order. No biggie. As I type this, the countdown timer is dropping pretty quickly. What was 59 minutes is now 51 minutes, in the span of two earth minutes. Looks like either Postmates has their own measure of time, or the Postmates universe moves faster than Earth. Noted.

7:27pm – 48 minutes. Thinking about this food is making me hungrier. Thinking about this food while writing about thinking about this food is just adding to the struggle. Time to include this for the first time in this post: Affirmation of Laziness as a Service. We’ll call it AoLaaS.

7:28pm – 40 minutes. Theory on Postmates Universe time constriction confirmed. Time to start writing my award-winning paper. Hon. Dr. Johnathan Lyman. I like the way that sounds.

7:31pm – I think I should text Sheepdog, and say thank you.

Hey Sheepdog, thanks for picking up my food, this evening! Just to confirm the entry codes: if you can’t get throug the gate, use ** … the elevator is **. Thanks!

Having a non-local number is hard for my dual-call-box system. I haven’t given up my WA area code so issuing manual access codes is required. I’m trying to be a nice guy, here.

7:33pm – Sheepdog thanks me for the info. For a minute I thought she wasn’t going to respond. This creepy guy texting her.

7:34pm – 8 minutes. She’s on her way to the food. I can see it on the map! Starting to get excited.

7:38pm – Sheepdog securing the package, code name Lamb Chop.

7:42pm – Pending confirmation of package secure. Standby.

7:46pm – Confirm package Secure. Package en route to primary LZ for extraction to my food hole.

7:48pm – Package inbound. ETA 4 minutes. Now I’m hungry.

7:51pm – It’s just like Uber, watching them get closer and closer to you. [Jaws theme slowly builds in the background]

7:53pm – Interesting. the time compression witnessed pre-pickup is reversed post-pickup. Will note time dilation in logs.

7:56pm – Package picked at LZ. Commence food-hole shoving.

Notes:

  • Fountain drink (menu) does not equal can (reality). Shame. -1 Restaurant.
  • I get to rate the driver (who did excellent), but I don’t get to rate the restaurant. Interesting.

So that about does it! Food is in my lap and this pseudo-live blog is done!

Update

After trying the food, I will say it was a bit on the cold side. Not super impressed by that. However, this type of food I ordered won’t stay hot long under any circumstance, so I can’t knock off too many points. It is something I will have to consider for the future, however.

Update 2

The food was gross. Gyro was flavorless. Barely any meat. I was deceived by how much meat it looked like it had. Definitely not worth the money. Lame. Still hungry.

Sorry, Sodastream, Coke is Still Number One

There’s something that’s utterly delicious about brand-named Coca Cola that my Sodastream just can’t replace. Sorry, but the syrup masterminds in Tel Aviv just can’t fool me.

I don’t necessarily think it’s the fact that it’s in a can. I think it has to do with the syrup.

Yeah, I know, big revelation there, for sure. Sue me.

While I write this, I’m taking the occasional swig from a can of Coke Zero, the Coke product that tastes the most like Sodastream’s Cola flavor. I think, after it’s all said and done, what it comes down to is the “natural flavors.” Whatever they are, they’re made from a natural source and turned into a chemical of some kind that makes sense for a production line.

There’s also something about the crispness that I just can’t seem to master with the Sodastream. Perhaps it’s the level of carbonation.

Whatever the differences are, I’m sure I could find answers if I searched the Internet. Since I’m writing this, I didn’t, and I don’t plan on it.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a soda to finish.

Testing Out a New Temporary Markdown Editor

I’ve been in search for a backup Markdown editor while my goto app is updated to fix a rather lethal crash bug. For those wondering, as of this writing, Desk PM is my goto and when attempting to work through the publish menus, the app always crashes, and always forgets my work. No good.

So in the meantime I had to find an alternative, if I’m going to restart my blogging habits for 2016.

The theme here is simplicity. All I need is a distraction-free space to write my thoughts down in Markdown format, and special formatting is optional.

The first app on my list is Typora. It’s not a very complex app but what it does, it seems to do well. Launching Typora takes you to a blank canvas, just like I’d expect. It comes with six themes out of the box and more can be added by way of CSS. Yes, it’s that customizable.

One of the first things I did was open the .css file for the theme of my choice, Pixyll, and edit the #write ID element and widened the max-width to 1200px from the default 854px. Given I want a full-screen write space, I felt 854px against my screen was a bit small. With 1200px, this set me up for about 65-75% width used depending on the resolution I’m at. I tend to operate at 1680×1050 equivalent, most of the time.

This is the editor as a whole: it’s super minimal, with little fluff. A settings pane is available under Preferences that allows you to make some tweaks to the app, including font size, window style, access to the themes folder (big plus) and a few other settings. Again, nothing totally crazy here, because it’s a simple app. It’s not claiming to be your word processor replacement, and I wouldn’t it want to be mine.

While it would be nice to edit some of the theme settings without having to modify css, I’m personally OK with that and once I have it the way I want, it’s a set-and-forget kind of deal.

The real question is will this become a permanent tool? Maybe. It depends on what my goals are. As it stands, today, I have to copy and paste into WordPress and publish from there, which takes a few extra minutes when I factor adjustments and image uploads, etc. If this app were to become a blogging tool, it’d need to be full service in order for it to fill that void for me. Right now, it’s temporary, and may always hold a place when I need to write some markdown for something non-blogging-related.

With that being said, it’s a good app. I don’t have any major complaints, to be honest. It’s free while in beta for Mac, Windows, and soon Linux.

Johnathan Lyman
Kenmore, WA,
United States
 
blogging, design, technology, software, development, gaming, photography